| Are you the parent of a child with autism that has had | | | | your anger may get the best of you. Remember that |
| major conflicts, with special education personnel? Has | | | | being assertive means staying as calm as possible, but |
| your school district developed an IEP for your child with | | | | working toward getting your child the services they |
| a severe learning disability, but refuses to follow it? | | | | need. |
| Have you spent thousands of dollars trying to ensure | | | | 3. Focus on what educational and related services that |
| that your child receives a free appropriate public | | | | your child needs. Bring a list of items that you would |
| education (FAPE)? Anger is a very common emotion | | | | like to discuss, and check them off as you discuss |
| that you may feel, especially if your child is denied | | | | them. Write down what you are promised for your |
| needed educational services. This article will discuss | | | | child, and make sure that it is written in your child's IEP. |
| how to turn that anger around, and use it to benefit | | | | By focusing on your child, you will be less likely to get |
| your child's education. | | | | angry. |
| Many parents experience a lot of difficulty, when trying | | | | 4. Repeat, repeat, repeat. Use this strategy, when |
| to get their child with a disability a free appropriate | | | | special education personnel try and change the |
| public education. In fact it is my belief that few children | | | | subject, when you are asking for needed educational |
| with disabilities in the U.S. actually receive FAPE. | | | | services for your child. For Example: We were |
| Some special education personnel use tactics such as | | | | discussing my child's need for Applied Behavioral |
| blaming the parent, in order to not have to pay for | | | | Analysis (ABA), please stop changing the subject and |
| expensive special education services. A lot of anger | | | | address this issue. This strategy works; refuse to |
| that parents feel is justified anger. But if the anger | | | | move the discussion along until the important issues |
| becomes explosive, you will not be able to help your | | | | are discussed. |
| child. Use these tips to help you control your anger, to | | | | 5. Bring a friend or advocate with you to any meetings |
| benefit your child: | | | | that you are concerned may become adversarial. Also |
| 1. If you are in an IEP meeting, and you feel yourself | | | | consider tape recording, special education personnel |
| getting angry, ask for a small break. Go outside, or | | | | are often careful of what they say when it is being |
| walk in the hallway. This will give you a chance to calm | | | | tape recorded. |
| yourself down, so that you can be a more effective | | | | 6. If you find yourself getting angry over a dispute; |
| advocate, for your child. | | | | write a letter to special education personnel. In the |
| 2. Stand up to school personnel in an assertive manner, | | | | letter, clearly state what the dispute is; stick to facts, |
| if they try and blame you for your child's difficulty. You | | | | keep emotion out. By writing a letter you will decrease |
| do not cause your child's autism, or learning disability, or | | | | your chances of letting your anger overtake you. |
| behavioral difficulty. This is a tactic used by many | | | | By using these easy strategies you will be able to |
| special education personnel, and sometimes catch a | | | | keep your anger in check, as you advocate for an |
| parent off guard. | | | | appropriate education for your child. Good Luck in your |
| If you do not stand up to the personnel blaming you, | | | | advocacy journey, remember you are not alone! |