| Class rule: No putdowns, no exceptions... not by | | | | eating disorder who shared with me "one line" |
| students or by the teacher. | | | | someone said to her in the seventh grade that sent |
| Mat and Rick walk into the classroom putting each | | | | her into the spiral of the eating disorder. She could |
| other down jovially. Friends, they often banter with | | | | pinpoint the putdown to that moment in time. Also, |
| each other for fun. Today, however, Matt's teasing | | | | remember the student shooter in San Diego? He |
| suddenly struck a tender chord with Rick. Rick flushed. | | | | laughed off the putdowns he had to endure. Then he |
| Suddenly, they were pushing, shoving, and shouting | | | | showed up at school with a gun. |
| angry words at teach other. The friendly teasing has | | | | - I ask, "How do we know that our words meant in fun |
| escalated to trouble. | | | | are taken as they are meant?" Is it worth the risk? |
| Sarcasm and putdowns are at best a risky source of | | | | - What if we encouraged our students to share when |
| humor in the classroom. Even if it never turns to blows, | | | | words came across as putdowns even when the |
| it could unwittingly cause hurt feelings or confuse | | | | person using the putdown is the teacher? What kind |
| students who have difficulty reading and interpreting | | | | of environment would that create in our classrooms? |
| social cues. Given a teacher's inability to know how | | | | - Many adults who use sarcastic humor become very |
| each student will react to sarcastic humor, a "no | | | | defensive when this rule is suggested. Why do you |
| putdown" rule can save a lot of heartache and, at the | | | | think that is? We need to ask ourselves, "What kind of |
| same time, create the foundation for a caring inclusive | | | | room do I want to run? What kind of community do I |
| classroom community. | | | | want to create in my classroom? How do I achieve |
| Why might some teachers or students resist this rule? | | | | that?" |
| Sarcasm and put-downs have become an acceptable | | | | - People who use sarcasm as humor are not bad |
| form of entertainment and humor in our society. | | | | people. Rather, they are conditioned by their upbringing |
| Because of this cultural acceptance people, young and | | | | or our media culture to enjoy it, accept it, and use it. |
| old, rationalize that it is OK to denigrate another person | | | | Awareness is the first step to change. |
| in the name of 'teasing", good-fun, and humor. | | | | What do you do when someone uses putdowns in the |
| Unfortunately, this belief system causes problems: | | | | classroom? |
| - There are people, students included, who cannot | | | | - Immediately address it. Remind students of the rule |
| read the difference between sarcastic humor and | | | | and of the goal of having a "safe place" in your |
| intentional meanness. Many learning disabled students | | | | classroom. |
| are in this group. | | | | - If repeated, have a private conversation with the |
| - Students learn best in a safe, non-threatening | | | | offender. When appropriate, require restitution. For |
| environment. How does the teacher draw the line | | | | example: Student must give the person two kind |
| between what is humor and what is bullying or mean? | | | | comments for each putdown. |
| - I used to tell my students, "Even if someone laughs at | | | | - Enforce the classroom discipline policy. |
| your teasing, how do you really know what they are | | | | - If it's you, the teacher, admit your mistake, apologize |
| feeling? Would most students, especially male students | | | | and try harder next time. You are making progress |
| 'show' their hurt?" I talked to a young woman with an | | | | and creating positive change. Keep up the good work! |