Caring for Aged Parents? Beware Caregiver's Stress

Do you, like many other Baby Boomers, now findthan children. They also feel torn between their own
yourself caring for aging parents or other olderneeds for work, vacations, privacy, hobbies, or friends
relatives or friends who have health problems,and feelings of guilt, resentment, or even depression or
disabilities, or the need for assistance with daily tasksmartyrdom. Both aging parents and caregiver children
such as bathing, dressing, and eating? If so, you arelose independence and privacy. Even the most
part of one fourth of American families who are caringcongenial relationships can suffer from these loses.
for an older family member, an adult child withHere are some recommendations to help you take
disabilities, or a friend. According to the AARP, you arecare of your own health:o Eat a healthy diet and drink
one of more than 22.4 million Americans who are nowplenty of water. Avoid sugars, fats, and salt. Include
caregivers to older adults, a number that has tripled inplenty of fresh fruits and vegetables. Follow the
the last 10 years alone. The average amount of timeguidelines of the government's food pyramid for
these Americans spend on caregiving is about 20proper amounts and food types to include in your daily
hours per week with many of these hours spent inmenu. Take a good multivitamin for extra protection.o
physically demanding work. With the life spans raisingGet plenty of rest and sleep, even if you have to enlist
over the past century from 49 -77, some children arehelp to care for your parents while you rest. Spend
actually caring for invalid parents 20 years, longer thansome time unwinding and relaxing during the day as
the parents spent raising them.well.o Get regular, healthy exercise at least three days
I would like to ask you a question? How is your owna week. Regular exercise not only reduces stress and
personal health? One third of caregivers describe theirimproves health, but also produces endorphins, which
personal health as fair to poor, and many worry thatadd to a good feeling mood.o Keep your own health
they won't outlive the person for whom they arecare up to date, including yearly checkups. If you
caring. As you and other caregivers struggle toexperience negative feelings, get counseling from
balance caregiving with other responsibilities, includingdoctor or therapist, or share your feelings with good
full-time jobs and caring for children, constant stressfriends.o Speaking of friends, keep your social life
can lead to "burnout" and health problems. You mayactive in order to stay connected with your community
feel guilty, frustrated, and angry from time to time,and to give an outlet for stress. Seek comfort and
suffer from depression, and become ill easily yourself.support in your faith-based group as well.o Remember
Caring for even the most beloved parents can seemyou are not alone. Seek support groups for caregivers,
like a burden when your own health collapses fromespecially if you are caring for a loved one with a
endless hours of caring for their needs.disease. Look online for government or state
For example, caring for a parent with Alzheimer'ssupported groups and help departments. Find
disease (AD) or other kinds of dementia at home cancommunity support groups.o Make arrangements for
be overwhelming. The caregiver must cope withyour own vacations and retreats, for regrouping and
declining abilities and difficult behaviors that affect evenrefreshing yourself, your spouse, and your own
basic activities of daily living and often become hard tochildren. Remember, you are not the only one affected
manage for both the care receiver and the caregiver.by your live-in parent situation. Your entire family
As the disease worsens, the care receiver usuallyexperiences changes and stresses along with you.
needs 24-hour care.Arrange for someone to stay with your parent and
In addition to the constant care required, caregivers ofspend some time as a family away from home and
parents with this type of problem also suffer from thethose extra responsibilities.o Remind yourself of the
emotional pain of losing communication with parentscare that your parent lavished on you as a child and
who no longer recognize them. To sustain this, andhow you felt about that parent then. Often, we get so
other types of prolonged stress and care, you need tobusy that we forget how much we really love our
call upon other family members, friends, and neighborsparents, especially in the throes of caring for them. Try
for help. If other caregivers aren't available to fill in,to revisit happier days with them and remind both
respite care services may be available in thethem and yourself of those times. Bring out family
community to help you. Respite care can be a goodpictures and relive happy days together.
way for you to get a break (respite) from constantIf you are a caregiver, remember to care for your
caregiving.own health as well as that of your loved one. Seek
Some caregivers are still raising their own children andcomfort, help, time to refresh yourself, and regular
feel torn between the needs of their children and theexercise to ensure that you will remain able to give
needs of their parents. In fact, in this day of smallthat care and still maintain your personal wellness.
families, many Americans may have more parentsCopyright 2006 Dr.